“The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself.”
Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free
I had come back to Halifax for a brief visit but was back for good, whether I liked it or not. I’d been in Virginia for a long time. Eight years exactly. And done pretty well. Flew under the radar comfortably and successfully. Life was good, I thought.
It was a struggle in the beginning. A new country, a new business to get off the ground. Some days were harder than others but the preachers on the radio had become an inspiration. It kind of just happened. I was by no means a bible thumping religious devotee. Of course, I’d gone to church at Christmas-time. Thought about going, or should go, at Easter, but never actually did. There was always something that needed to be done. A football game that needed to be watched. A cold beer, cigarette and an easy chair on the deck with my name written all over it. Life was good. The Lord had intervened and what had been mere coincidence in the past, was now Devine providence. Faith tentatively discovered was now embraced. It was working too consistently to be dismissed. Like the radio, I’d dialed God’s station and was tuned in, turned on and filled with Grace. Life certainly was good.
The Border Guard in my face had a different take on the matter however. The return from the brief visit had turned into a grueling, intimidating interrogation. I was back in Halifax for good. My life was changed and reluctantly begun anew.
Like life has a tendency to do, we fast forward a couple of years to a cozy living room and a crackling fireplace. I ponder my story while stroking Juanita’s forearm gazing into her green speckled wondrous eyes. Her lips, moist and full. I delight in her warm breath on my cheek. Since the divorce it’s been a while since I’ve felt the embrace of a woman against my body. Something electric fires inside and I feel the need for short gasps of oxygen when she’s close like this. Her body is soft, her back defined, her smell sweet and intoxicating. I can’t help but chuckle inside and she follows suit with a questioning smile and the kind of ease that is both teasing and pleasing. Candle light illuminates her gorgeous smiling features. Love, like music soothes one’s wounds and strengthens one’s purpose.
I’ve recently hit mid-life and my life has taken a new path. Enlightenment, good health and positivity were lip service pursued in thought but rarely followed through on. Now this Self Love is my mantra and newest salvation. The alcohol and nicotine induced weekend “fun” wanes, replaced by a new clarity. TV watching is rare now. My brain has come back, revitalized and a youthful excitement for postponed dreams has returned. Thoughtful anticipation replaces anxious impatience. Nova Scotia landscapes are deep and rich and the ocean sparkles brighter than ever before. I pause now for smiling faces, conversation and sounds of children at play. I love to cycle through warm sunshine. Stride along beaches, gazing at rhythmic harmonic waves crashing to the shore. Smiling, talking, dinner, board games. Caring, laughing, caressing, lovemaking. Savoring every moment. Feeling good, eating well, re-connecting. It’s a re-birth, new opportunities with abundant possibility. The future is now. I’m swimming in it. I’ve come to the conclusion as many have before me: Time is fleeting. The life we’ve worked toward is upon us. Dreams nurtured are ready for harvest. Happiness, ease, joy and satisfaction surround and flow through our daily existence.
It’s been a long time coming and I don’t intend to miss the train. I’ve hopped aboard the Express. From Boomer to Zoomer. From complacency and distraction to vitality and purpose. Join with me. Jump on board. The train may be leaving sooner than you think.